We are lucky in Acton and Boxborough because we experience relatively few problems with our players, parents or coaches.

Keep the following thoughts in mind as you participate in or observe ABYS games.

Remember that it's a game!

The primary purpose of enrolling our children in soccer and other youth sports programs is so that they have an opportunity to play. There are other benefits: exercise; development of motor and social skills; learning to strive; learning to lose and not quit. While I find that, whether you win or lose, trying your hardest and working to improve your ball skills and tactics produce pride and satisfaction, for most children the purpose of the game is pure play. Parents' and coaches' emphasis should be the same. The best measure of success for us over the long term will be the number of 16 year olds who still play soccer because it's fun, even though they are not on a school team. Let's let the kids have fun at every practice and game.

Let players play!

At older ages, it's unnecessary even for the coach, except for occasional reminders about positioning. At younger ages (especially under 8), active coaching does help young children learn the game. But this instruction should come only from the coaches. Too many cooks spoil the broth and confuse the players. We do welcome enthusiasm, but there is a difference between yelling and cheering. So, be general in what you shout. Say "Go!" instead of "Shoot!" or "Pass!" Let the player think for himself, it's an important part of the game and of growing up. At the end of a play, you may then be more specific by saying "Great pass!" or "Great effort!" or "Great save! "

Let referees referee!

We allow 12 year olds and up to referee games. We have had a few instances where an in-house referee, serving the game and all its participants, felt intimidated or was reduced to tears by an angry parent. No adult should ever berate a young referee. We have found that where there is a disagreement about a rule or interpretation, our young referees are right much more often than our angry parents or coaches. If you excoriate one of our referees, you are in the wrong, It's that simple. If there is a problem, speak to your child's coach and let her handle it or contact one of our Referee Directors. At the end of matches, we hope to hear more players, coaches and parents thank our referees for a good game.

Stay off the goals, nets, and corner flags

Every year there are injuries in this country, sometimes fatal, due to kids climbing on soccer goals that topple over onto them. Please help us keep the players and others from climbing on the goals or nets at all times.